Movies I have Sat Through but Probably Shouldn't Have

 

MOVIES I HAVE SAT THROUGH   rating scale of 1-10.  Cinema rating 1^st, mine at the end

Black Widow 2:14- 7.6 - I didn’t dislike this as much as Coleman. although it was about an Avenger that I could give two shits about. Only thing that could have made it better was if Hawkeye was in it and he got killed.. I give it 5.8.

Eternals 2:36- 7.1 -  I didn’t know this was a Marvel superhero movie, but not a good Marvel movie. Superheros fighting alien dogs. None of them is a likable hero. I was rooting for them all to die. The movie title should have warned me. I felt it would never end. I give it 4.4 for Angelina Jolie’s skimpy outfit. Otherwise 3.5. More bad news, if you sit through the credits, there’s more movie that threatens a sequel.

Reno 911! The Hunt for QAnon 1:25- rating 8.3 - fucking hilarious from start to finish with all the characters back. Took me forever to watch because I had to keep rewinding to watch the funny stuff twice. I give it 9.7 instead of a 10 because I had to sit thru Trudi dancing during the credits. Some stuff you can’t unsee.

Pleasure 1:45 - 6.7 – Swedish girl comes to America to become a porn star and screws her way to the top, literally. I watched it because I was curious how far a major motion picture would take it. Further than I thought. Not a first date or watch with the in-laws movie. I guess the moral of the movie is you can make a lot of money in porn. I give it a 1.3.

Respect 2:25 – 6.8 – Not real happy I had to sit through this one but it was next on the list. Super long with wall to wall drama and soul music, two things I most dislike in a movie. I thought that having a Wayons brother in it might have a funny moment but no, all he did was smack her around, which really wasn't that funny.. Did I mention how long it was. I did hear her 3 songs I actually knew, and did learn a little about recording back in the day so all was not lost. I give it a 4.0.

Cry Macho 1:44 – 6.3 – Soooo hard to watch a 110 year old Clint pretend he could still break wild horses. Worse than watching John Wayne ride with the reins in his teeth in the back of a truck in True Grit. Every time Clint moved I expected to hear a hip break.  Movie plot made it watchable tho. I give it 5.8.

The Power of the Dog 2:07 – 6.6 – Australian made western set in Montana circa 1920’s. Not really a good movie. It’s just about two brothers running a big ass ranch. I liked the twist at the end but you have to sit through the whole movie to get there. Movie has a Yellowstone vs Brokeback Mountain vibe to it. I give it 5.2. because at least it was a western. Academy award nominee.

The Last Mercenary 1:50 – 6.8 – Listed on Cinema as Action Comedy. When was the last time Jean Claude Van Dam was funny. Like Clint, Jean hasn’t aged that well. Every time he kicked someone I expected his leg to snap. I guess that’s where the comedy came in. Basically the same as any Van Dam movie, his acting hasn’t gotten better with time. I give it 4.8

Injustice 1:18 - 7.9 – Animated DC comics movie with all the DC characters. Superman decides to play god and dispense all the justice in the world and the others try to stop him. Not sure what comic nerds ran this rating up so high. I like comics and still only give it a 5 due to poor acting.

The Trip 1:53 – 6.8 – Normally once I saw that this was a German movie I would have quit on the spot. Glad I hung in. Its funny and yet as gory as any horror flick. Reminds me of Tucker and Dale. I give it 8.5 because it has a some amount of drama at times.

Witch Hunt 1:32 – 7.2 – Woman helps illegal witches across the Mexican border where witchcraft is legal along with fireworks and donkey shows.  Way too dramatic and special effects are mediocre. I wish a witch would make me forget that I watched this. I give it a paltry 3.4.

Snoopy presents Auld Lang Syne :39 – 7.3 – Not sure why this is in the Movies section but it was good if you grew up on the Peanuts specials on TV. The good thing is that even though Charlie Brown is like 75 now, it doesn’t look like he’s aged a bit. And he’s still a good actor. I give it 8.0

Back to the Outback 1:32 – 7.8 – You know I do love my animated movies but this one was a big disappointment. It took me three attempts to get through it because I kept falling asleep. The koala is a little funny but none of the other character are. The animals escape from the zoo to be free. Hmmm. The owners of Madagascar should be suing. I give it 3.0